Finding the Light

I received this in an email from Dan Joseph, a student of A Course in Miracles and writer of the Quiet Mind, the only newsletter I receive which I make a point of reading carefully because there is ALWAYS good value in it. I have decided that from now on, I am going to share his stuff on this blog.

This month marks thirty years since I began studying spiritual teachings. In September 1990, I was back in college after completing a corporate internship in New York.

I had spent the previous summer sitting by myself in a back office, uncomfortable in my suit and tie, researching ways to sell laundry detergent. The whole thing had felt utterly meaningless.

So here I was, back in college, searching for a new path in life. I began reading the western philosophers, then selections from the world's religions and mystics. Soon thereafter I bought a copy of A Course in Miracles, and started a more formal spiritual practice.

As I turned to those spiritual teachings, I envisioned myself setting out on a journey – a climb up the mountain to enlightenment. In contrast to my business work, this felt profoundly meaningful. Exciting, even. I plunged into the spiritual journey with intensity.

However, there was a basic lesson that I didn't understand then. In fact, I didn't grasp it for a very long time. It is this:

The spiritual experience – the experience of our inner light – is not something that we journey toward. It is something that we simply open to.

The light is with us at every moment, clear and bright in the present moment. There is no spiritual distance to travel; no spiritual mountain to climb. The light is here, always, and we can never truly separate ourselves from it.

We can obscure our spiritual light from our awareness, of course. This is the basic situation of the world. But our awareness can shift at any moment back to the light.

This one lesson could have saved me a great deal of time. However, I was so caught up in striving and achieving that my mind misperceived the situation. Enlightenment seemed like something that was earned at the end of a long battle or struggle. But that is not how things work.

Everything beautiful is with us at this moment, shining as a reflection of the light. The experience of safety, connection, innocence, peace – these, and more, arise in our awareness as we open to them. These experiences are with us in this present moment, simply awaiting our acceptance. There is no journey to the spiritual light; there is only acceptance of what is already there.

Now, I often share these thoughts with people and they say, "Dan, I have no idea what you're talking about! My present moment is nothing like that. My present moment is filled with a bunch of stress and agitation – not peace and light!"

They are right, of course, that their awareness is currently filled with those things. But in my work as counselor, I've seen over and over how dramatically and quickly awareness can shift.

In this newsletter article, I'd like to share a variety of "distractions" that keep our awareness focused away from the light. As we identify these distractions, we can express our willingness to let them go. This creates room for the light to emerge – not in some distant future, but now.

The Four Points

To begin, let me cover four of the most common distractions. I call these the compass points.

Imagine looking north, south, east, and west within your awareness. In these four directions lie some common distractions.

To the north we have any critical or otherwise unloving thoughts about the people in your life. Thoughts like:

     "My boss doesn't respect me! She is so full of herself!"
     "My partner really isn't being fair to me. He needs to change."
     "That politician is the bane of my existence!"

And so on. Any of these thoughts will inhibit your awareness of the inner light, and all its rewards – a sense of joy, security, peace, and so forth.

As you notice these types of thoughts, you can simply express your willingness to let them go. You can say:

     "I have no interest in this thought.
     It's interfering with my awareness of my inner light,
     and I am willing to let it go."

That's it! If the distracting thoughts persist, simply rest in your willingness to let them go. Your willingness can always outlast the thoughts.

To the south we have a parallel group of distractions: any self-critical or unloving thoughts toward yourself.

People who are more prone to anger may find the northern thoughts easier to find; folks who are more attuned to shame or guilt will probably find these southern thoughts more accessible. In truth, they're the same.

These southern thoughts might be clearly self-attacking, or they might be much more subtle. For example, you might find self-pressuring thought-sequences like:

     "I don't think I did a great job on that project."
     "I really need to do a better job next time."
     "People are counting on me; I can't mess up again."

Many people consider this type of thinking to be harmless – even helpful in a self-motivating way. However, any therapist will tell you that self-critical, self-pressuring thinking is at the root of many of their clients' misery. Taken to extremes, this type of thinking can lead to self-destructive tendencies.

For our purposes, we simply treat these southern thoughts as distractions. They are unloving, and therefore they will inhibit our awareness of the light. As with the northern thoughts, we express our willingness to let these thoughts go.

To the west are unpeaceful thoughts about the past. Although these may take the form of statements like the above, it's far more likely that they will simply arise as memories.

For example:

     You may recall something unkind you did to someone last year.
     You may remember a statement someone made to you that felt disrespectful.
     Or you may have fairly basic memories of work or personal activities.

Because our goal is to experience the fullness of the spiritual light, these memory-recalls can distract the mind. As with any other interfering thoughts, we simply express our willingness to let them go. You might want to envision them as clouds or leaves floating by – thought-forms that are not worth your engagement.

To the east are distracting thoughts about the future. For example:

     Worries about a situation that is going to take place next week.
     Concerns about your retirement strategies.
     Or even plans about what to eat for dinner.

There's nothing wrong or bad about any of these types of thoughts. However, they can obscure our awareness of the light – and during this practice, it is the light we seek. As with the others, we simply express our willingness to let each one of these go as they rise in our awareness.

Note that the thoughts can be mid-way between the compass points: A self-critical, guilt-filled memory contains both the western and southern directions. An angry expectation about what someone in your life might do is mid-way between the eastern and northern points.

There is no need to categorize these, of course – and you can choose different "directions" as you wish. But the goal is to notice the interfering thoughts in whatever form they appear, and hold a willingness to let them go.

Two Subtle Ones

Those four points (and the ranges between them) cover a lot of ground. By identifying those type of thoughts, you'll likely be able to clear away quite a bit of interference to the light.

However, there are more subtle forms of distraction as well. Let me briefly share two of these that I referenced in my previous story.

1. The thought that the light needs to be "earned."

As I mentioned, when I began my spiritual studies, I figured that I had to work my way toward enlightenment – by acting nobly, or understanding metaphysical ideas, or perhaps something else. I wasn't sure. But the experience of the light seemed like a reward to be won.

What I didn't realize is that this was just another distracting thought. It took the form of a background "belief," so it was less obvious than things like worries and resentments. But it effectively obscured the light for a while.

If you find that you have this thought in some form, you can treat it like the others. Simply note it, express your willingness to let it go, and invite your inner light to arise in your awareness.

As an aid, you may also want to introduce a new set of beliefs designed to replace the old. You can say:

     "The spiritual light is given to everyone, including me."
     "There is nothing that I need do to earn it."
     "It is given freely, and simply awaits my acceptance."

Or you can choose others. Once those new thoughts have replaced the old, you can express your willingness to move into the experience of the light itself.

The second of the subtle distractions is a parallel to the first.

2. The thought that the light is in the future.

This, again, is just a distracting thought, or belief. As before, you may want to correct it by saying:

     "The spiritual light is with me at every moment."
     "There is never a moment that I am without it."
     "I may not always be aware of it, but the light is here, right now, for the accepting."

In both of these situations, we're correcting the mind's belief that there is distance between us and what we seek. We are acknowledging that our awareness might be obscured, but this does not mean that the light is actually gone.

You deserve to experience all the facets of your inner light – a feeling of being loved, cared-for, safe, and at peace; a sense of your worth, innocence, and beauty; an experience of connection, joy, abundance, and boundless giving. You deserve all these, and more. Not in the distant future, and not after you've accomplished anything – but right now, in this present moment.

By identifying any distracting cloud-thoughts, and allowing them to pass by, we make room for these experiences to arise in our awareness.

The world needs miracle workers – channels for the light. All that is needed is for us to open our awareness to it. As we do that, one moment at a time, the light pours forth on its own.