True Be The Hearts That Love You

So, Sunday, I drove Dadda to see his youngest brother to pass on some medicine. His brother lives in the middle of nowhere and before we went, I wanted to see all the Arnold stuff was taken care of. I mean, his morning walk, his weekly bath, his dinner. Only problem was I woke up late (being out until past two the night before for Mark's birthday didn't help).

I said we would leave at noon and I went I got back from Arnold's walk, it was 11.30 and Dadda was blustering and hopping on coals. I thought about the way I would normally respond which is to get mad and ask him to find his own way of getting to the middle of nowhere without me. But I'd just listened my daily Tony Robbins tape that a dear colleague had given me for Christmas and had just defined failure as reacting the way I always react rather than responding. So I just went calmly on, made Arnold drink his water, bathed him (two lathers), wiped him down, had my own shower and changed, ladled out his food and then I was ready to leave. And it was noon. Sharp.

My father (who always reacts to these things like they're a way for me to diss him got into the with a face like thunder). I decided to ignore it. Not respond angrily, not try to placate him.

Libera was playing on the radio (the best of...Eternal CD) and the music is incredibly sweet and soothing. No temper can really last through it unless you're really determined to be angry.

I wasn't that angry to begin with, but I found even that little loosening. As we passed the Sungai Besi toll, I asked him how to get there. He called his brother and got instructions (which we totally messed up because he's not used to the new Kajang).

So I pulled over to the side of the road and my uncle, who had been waiting for us at the church which he thought was an easy landmark to find came out to find us. And then we went to a mamak for lunch and then over to his place for tea and fruitcake and chocolate.

I found a pack of angel cards on his altar and looked at him in surprise. "Angel cards?"

"Helen got me that," he said.

So I picked one. It said: "Play". So my message was that I would not be writing the story I thought I would be writing when I got back home. He also brought out a set of life purpose cards and I picked "Study". Hmmm....there seems to be a contradiction here.

Anyway, my uncle had all sorts of kooky things, compliments of his wife who is presently in England, and he talked about how he tries everything for two or three days and then gives up. He'd put on "music" which was one of those "rain on the roof" kind which is supposed to rewire your brain. It was soothing ambient sound and his apartment was very cool. Listening to the two talk about family matters and India and politics and God knows what else, I fell asleep.

I snapped out of slumber when I heard my uncle's voice apologise for boring me. I said I wasn't bored. I was lulled. We talked about his tendency for self sabotage and his habit of buying books he never reads beyond three pages and what to do about it.

Towards the end, he said...thank you, good conversation and seemed more positive. And as we took off for home, the atmosphere in the car was so different from before. And I changed the Libera CD for another Libera CD. (The best of, is a double CD) and gave myself up to the music. And got back in time for Dadda to get to church on time. Despite a traffic jam and minor storm along he way.

Sometimes it feels like someone has gotten inside me and ironed out the wrinkles. You know what I mean?